It's alright.

So I was 234 at the doctor's appointment. NOT what I wanted to see... but it's T.O.M. so if I work my butt hard this week I'll hopefully drop it and then some by the end of the month.

The doctor agrees that I've hit a plateau with the way I workout and that getting a B.R. will help with my mobility and I'll be able to do stuff I can't do now. Like run. I'm seriously obsessed with being able to run once the surgery and healing is done. 

I'll continue to eat 1400 and walk 3 miles a day and hopefully by the time this is over I'll have a smaller chest AND a smaller rest of the body.

I'm not going to get discouraged, even though she told me that this time last year I was 209. I know, I know. I can't keep beating myself up. No matter how much I berate myself it's not going to shed 40 lbs. off my body. Only I can do that.

I had oatmeal this morning at 260.

For lunch I'll have my bowl of chili with crackers which is 350.  That's 610 overall and it leaves me with 790 for dinner. I can do this. I WILL do this.

Last night we looked at this place in Provincetown called the Red Inn. It's beautiful. Sometime next spring we'll go look at it to see if we like it enough to get married there. WOW. That's scary. Something I never thought I would do. Get married. That's another reason I want to lose the weight and WILL lose the weight. I don't want to be a fat bride.